UK time is: 11:09:55
Vital Login
Social Login

Choose your club

Other Sites

Network Navigation

Vital Partners

'If It's Football, It's Vital'

Vital Arsenal Exclusive!

After attracting a greatly increased number of customers to the following brand over the last 3 years, it has come to the attention of Vital Arsenal member BazStores That there is in fact a problem with the brand.

I wont go into any more detail, I`ll let BazStores explain...

Trading Standard Officers have ordered the urgent recall of a defective product found to be faulty and dangerous.

Over the Christmas and New Year period, tests proved the components in the product called 'Chelsea FC' would fall apart when placed under the smallest amount of pressure. Consumers first experienced problems last year, when it was noted the product failed to work properly in Europe. Complaints were made about it malfunctioning and then emitting a continuous whining noise - usually in Portuguese. At the time the complaints were ignored. But when the product started falling apart in Britain over Christmas, the Trading Standards Authority took action.

A spokesman warned: 'We particularly want to stress to parents that, with Chelsea FC, there is a genuine risk of choking that may end in tears come May.

Despite assurances from the company behind the product that action was taken to correct the faulty parts, including abandoning the use of the highly unpredictable and sub-standard component 'Robert Huth', malfunctions have continued. Consumers have been urged to check the small print carefully for the words 'this product may contain traces of Shevchenko'. If that is the case buyers of the product are urged to put it back in its box and return immediately. 'Shevchenko' has been known to cause a severe allergic reaction in many consumers, causing them to shout involuntarily 'You useless Ukrainian t**t and 'for f*** sake bring back Carlton Cole'.



Article Submitted By BazStores



Articles submitted by Vital Arsenal members are based on the opinion of the member and not necessarily the view's of the network itself.




Use your social login to comment on front page articles. Login using you Facebook, Twitter, Google or LinkedIn accounts and have your say!


Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

The Journalist

Writer: Nick Simmonett  Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Friday January 12 2007

Time: 2:49PM

Your Comments

Apparently this year there is also a new over-priced useless ****-shaped part made in London, that seems to create short circuits that causes the system to shut down.
G4L
Trading Standard Officers have ordered the urgent recall of a defective product found to be faulty and dangerous. Over the Christmas and New Year period, tests proved the components in the product called 'Arsenal FC' would fall apart when placed under the smallest amount of pressure. Consumers first experienced problems last year, when it was noted the product failed to work properly in Europe. Complaints were made about it malfunctioning and then emitting a continuous whining noise - usually in French. At the time the complaints were ignored. But when the product started falling apart in Britain over Christmas, the Trading Standards Authority took action. A spokesman warned: 'We particularly want to stress to parents that, with Arsenal FC, there is a genuine risk of choking that may end in tears come May. Despite assurances from the company behind the product that action was taken to correct the faulty parts, including abandoning the use of the highly unpredictable and sub-standard component 'Freddie', malfunctions have continued. Consumers have been urged to check the small print carefully for the words 'this product may contain traces of Reyes'. If that is the case buyers of the product are urged to put it back in its box and return immediately. 'Reyes' has been known to cause a severe allergic reaction in many consumers, causing them to shout involuntarily 'You useless Spannish t**t and 'for f*** sake bring back Dennis Bergkamp'. Thats more like it, this aplies to both of your whinging teams and managers!!! COYS
Gavaldinho
Except that Reyes doesn't play for us anymore.
Little Dutch
bad copy-paste work.
G4L
Yeah, bad copy paste work. I'd have enjoyed it if you'd have come up with a proper retort, like that time they had a "Wenger Trial" over at vitalchelsea.
And by the way, the product hasn't worked well in the north in recent years, but it appears to work well in fog-prone areas lately!
Gaga
Product's still in the factory mate, using the latest 'Wengernode' technology. Not ready for the shelves yet, but will revolutionise the world in eighteen months time!
Little Dutch
No writing skils whatsoever Gavaldinho 0/10 for effort! The original was great stuff tho, bravo!
iceman10
same old spuds trying to nick other peoples ideas and then ruining them to perfection
fran merida
Bottomline - a total lack of originality, creativity.....
HK_Gunner
haha brilliant ! poor chelski they don't like it up em do they !
PUREGOLD
 

Have Your Say

Log in...
with your social network     OR     with your Vital account

Recent Arsenal Articles

It's The Positives That Worry Me (Tuesday November 25 2014)

Arteta: 'Shocked and Frustrated' (Monday November 24 2014)

The First Goal Matters (Saturday November 22 2014)

Wenger & Ozil Share a Mutual Trust (Wednesday November 19 2014)

Memories: Jens Lehmann (Wednesday November 19 2014)

Archived Arsenal Articles

List All Vital Arsenal Articles
Have your say
Click here to suggest an article
Click here to suggest a poll

Vital Members League (view all)

1. Amos. 105
2. paul_ownz 49
3. Naijagunner 48
4. Wyn Mills 40
5. Galway Gooner 40
6. shewore 29
7. Joe_@** 21
8. Little Dutch 15
9. damiano_tommassi 13
10. NYArse 11

League Results (view all)

Latest Results
Arsenal 1 - 2 Man Utd
Swansea 2 - 1 Arsenal
Arsenal 3 - 0 Burnley
Sunderland 0 - 2 Arsenal
Arsenal 2 - 2 Hull City
Chelsea 2 - 0 Arsenal

League Table (view table)

Team P W D L GD Pts
5. Newcastle 12 5 4 3 -1 19
6. West Ham 12 5 3 4 4 18
7. Swansea 12 5 3 4 3 18
8. Arsenal 12 4 5 3 5 17
9. Everton 12 4 5 3 3 17
10. Spurs 12 5 2 5 -1 17
11. Stoke 12 4 3 5 -2 15

Breaking League News

Fabianski wins Man of the Match Poll vs Man City
Swansea : 26/11/2014 11:00:00
Everton eye European advance
Everton : 26/11/2014 10:00:00
A Perfect Performance Says Di Matteo!
Chelsea : 26/11/2014 10:00:00
New Recruits amp; Transfer Policy
Spurs : 26/11/2014 09:51:00
Kone returns
Everton : 26/11/2014 09:00:00

Current Site Poll (view all polls)

With a stuttering start to the season what league position can we still reasonably aim for?
Suggested By:  
First 6%
Second 12%
Third 12%
Fourth 29%
Fifth or lower 35%
Still too early to bother with predictions 6%