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Shock: Lampard Has Medical At Villa

Tubby Tubster, Frank 'Ginsters' Lampard, has stunned the footballing world by undergoing a medical for Aston Villa.

Lampard eventually turned down the move to Villa after they only offered him 60 peppered steak pasties, 75 sausage rolls & 137 meat & tattie pies per week.

Frank 'I've never seen my winky' Lampard was quoted as saying, 'Pass the HP'

Please note, I'm am not the creator of this article (well the words are mine) the idea has been floating round the interweb, and I thought this was too good an opportunity to pass up.

Credit to The

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The Journalist

Writer: Rocky7 Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Tuesday January 16 2007

Time: 10:50PM

Your Comments (oldest first)

Change to most recent first
Writing genius at it's best. 10/10 Mush!
Report Abuse
16/01/2007 22:57:00

I wish the idea were mine, I squirted Stella out of my nose when I first saw it!!
Report Abuse
16/01/2007 22:59:00

he even turned down our famous balti pies, but we are going to up our offer to 70 peppered steak pasties, 100 sausage rolls, 150 meat & tattie pies, 75 balti pies, doug ellis on a spit roast and a keg of stella per week. watch the fat fu**er run for a pen now!
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 00:06:00

Watch Lampard run for a pen? Damn, I'll play just for the Stella! :P
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 00:23:00

Report Abuse
17/01/2007 03:42:00

stupid fat ******** frank
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 07:54:00

hahaha that is funny, at first I actually took it seriously ! doh silly me ! we need one of the morph guys to how us how lamps will look when he is 50
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 09:03:00

Good to see he's committed to losing some weight. Come on Frank, you can do it! FIVE MORE STONE! FIVE MORE STONE!
Little Dutch
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 09:21:00

Rocky! Has Stella got a sister?
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 12:46:00

Yeah, she's called Becks. Not as attractive, but she doesn't anger you quite so much.
Little Dutch
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 13:42:00

Too Funny! lol Atkins, Atkins whats the score!
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 13:49:00

simply superb.. hilarious..
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 18:52:00

Cant be any worse than our very own Juan Pablo Angel, give a start i say.
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 19:05:00

Thats not frank lampard! he's out of shot way behind this guy breathing out his @rse!
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 19:09:00

not funny but yea he is proberly better then Angel
Report Abuse
17/01/2007 19:28:00

I didn't realise lampard needed spectacles!!!
Report Abuse
18/01/2007 08:57:00

that was Funny?
Report Abuse
18/01/2007 11:20:00

Chelsea fan in sense of humour failure shock!!!!
Little Dutch
Report Abuse
18/01/2007 13:06:00

sod the article, I like the way fat boy is keeping his hands straight... obviously to make him more areodynamic!!
kenny lunt
Report Abuse
18/01/2007 13:31:00

what happens next is that fat frank falls over, bounces off the floor, hits the high jump pole and is deflected to an inexpilcable win in the 400m's... well you can change the sport the fat **** competes in but somethings never change!!
kenny lunt
Report Abuse
18/01/2007 13:34:00

If he cant do 100 Mts in less than 9.75n seconds you will have the let Spuds have him.
Report Abuse
20/01/2007 03:31:00


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