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Reasons to be Cheerful

Reasons to be Cheerful

There's a line in the Sex Pistols docufilm, the Filth and the Fury that always struck me. John Lydon, expert raconteur remarked, 'there's something about the British, that in your darkest moments, you laugh.' Following last night`s admittedly humiliating turnover to the Spuddies from up the road, it`s time to reflect on the positives:

1. Now we don`t have to go into every North London derby thinking, "surely this has to be their time?" We can fully focus on the fact that we are a better side without factoring in the "sun shines on a dog`s arse once a day" maxim.
2. We can sit back and laugh at the Totts when they inevitably fold like deckchairs in the Final. (Though it probably will be to Chelsea, which will remove all the fun).
3. Upon that eventuality, we can resurrect the "we saw you cry on the telly" chant of 2002 fame.
4. We can laugh when they release their commemorative DVD and "I was there when hell froze over" tee shirts.
5. Birmingham away won`t have to be moved to midweek.
6. When we romp to the treble we can thank the Spuds for taking away the distraction of a League Cup Final, annexed as it is between the two legs of the Milan tie. Arsene Wenger can point to this defeat as the moment that refocused us and turned our season.
7. Tottenham will take their eye off their league form as the Final approaches and tumble back towards the relegation places. Once they lose the final, completely demoralised, they slide further and further as Paul Jewell masterminds Derby`s miraculous escape. Tottenham are relegated. Juande Ramos will point to this game as the moment that turned their season for the worst.
8. Wembley really is a pain in the arse to get to, and wouldn`t we all prefer to visit in May, when the weather`s a bit nicer and the girlies where those nice vest tops?
9. For an example of how inferior the Spuddies are to us, compare and contrast, amount of posts left by Arsenal fans on Vital Spurs after our victory over them in December and amount of posts left by Spuds over here in the last twelve hours.
10. We really are much happier with the six league points off of them aren`t we?
11. May 1971.
12. April 2004.
13. The fact that 1961 was a really, really long time ago (FatOldDave didn`t even have his free bus pass back then!)
14. Spurs beat us once every nine years. That means we won`t have to put up with this feeling again until 2017.
15. We signed Sol Campbell……..for free!
16. The Marriott Hotel.
17. Tottenham had a brown away kit.
18. Technically, we can still call it Three Point Lane; no points were at stake last night.
19. The chance to sing "Tottenham watching Eastenders" when we play Milan, we`ll probably mean it a little bit more this time won`t we?
20. It was getting boring beating the Spuds all the time.
21. We don`t care about the Carling Cup anyway. It`s not like we wanted to win it. That`s why we put out the mascots and a selection of Junior Gunners who won the raffle at the last Christmas party.
22. Can I stop now…………….?LD.



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Writer:Tim Stillman
Date:Wednesday January 23 2008
Time: 1:59PM

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Comments

0
Oi! I loved our brown away kit...
skins
23/01/2008 14:05:00
0
Very funny, and all in good fun, i like it. Especially the brown kit thing. Interesting reasoning on the whole Spurs relegation theory.
Carlosio
23/01/2008 14:12:00
0
what about " we've already surpassed tottenham's point total in the league for this season" They won't get 54 points in the league
49ers
23/01/2008 14:14:00
0
i'd like to see a brown away kit. too many teams choose the same colours for their away kits, there seems to be a lot of blue. I guess the spuds had brown shorts and socks in the last game of 2 seasons ago following what they all ate at the Marriot that LD referred to. That day was amazing.
JakeB
23/01/2008 14:32:00
0
LD-thank you for this post which has made my day-i've soent all day listening to a load of spuds spouting ***** and have been waiting for the response so thanks for providing it!
Labwam
23/01/2008 14:35:00
0
LOL @ brown kit and the relegation theory....
WouldYouBelieveIt?!
23/01/2008 14:50:00
0
lol. Thanks LD! Worked a treat.
Cesky
23/01/2008 15:25:00
0
The relegation theory is all very plausible. Really very plausible. As it stands, they are just 7 points above safety. That's two draws and a defeat.
Gaga
23/01/2008 15:54:00
0
Another reason to be cheerful, St. Totteringham day is coming much earlier this year!
Gaga
23/01/2008 15:57:00
0
Clever words.......I'll save this page and then send you a link at teh end of teh season when guess what you won't polishing anything other than your needle dicks! I did prefer your bigger fish article - it actually made you sound like a gooner with a brain which I know is a contradiction in terms........Good luck against the toon..... I can see it going one way from here
bullers
23/01/2008 16:03:00
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