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GoonerChef Returns As Spurs Need Heimlich Maneuver

In 2006 the great North London rivalry returned for the first time in years. After many years in our shadow Tottenham threatened to finish above us in the league and obtain that much sought after 4th spot and a place in the Champions League.

Despite leading Arsenal almost the entire way Spurs blew it on the last day of the season after some of their players forgot to wash their hands after visiting the little spuddies room and they all came down with dysentery.

"Foul play" they cried, and the idea of the Gooner Chef was born.

After writing many letters insisting they had been robbed of their rightful place in the Champions League, Tottenham had to accept returning back to their status as shadow dwellers.

Over the next few years Spurs would spend lots of money looking to overtake their neighbours whilst Arsenal returned in kind by selling all of theirs, until we arrive at the 2011/12 campaign in which Tottenham go on a great run of games and claim that their best team in 50 years can go on to win the title.

The Gunners meanwhile get off to their worst start in what is just short of their entire history having lost valuable first team members in the summer, not least the amazing Francesc Fabregas.

Arsenal stutter through the first 20 odd games of the season whilst Spurs seem to go from strength to strength. "We`re going to murder them in the NLD" claim Tottenham fans, and at 2-0 after 20 minutes it appears as though their predictions would come to pass.

But just before half time, the spirit of the Gooner Chef returned and took possession of the Arsenal players leading them to a magnificent 5-2 victory. As the final whistle sounded the gurgle of dihorea coursing around the bowls of the Tottnum players was almost audible above the raucous cheering of the basking red and white clad Gooners.

What could, and should have been a 13 point lead for Spurs last week after being 2-0 up has transformed almost quite unbelievably to a mere four point gap between the two North London clubs after the Gunners rallied from 1-0 to win 2-1 in a hard fought game at Anfield, whilst the spurs crumbled yet again losing 3-1 at home to Manchester United despite being the better team on the day.

So as the end of the season races towards us, I urge Gooners everywhere to tease and taunt Tottenham fans, add to the doubts that have almost certainly already started creeping in to their heads.

The more they doubt, the more we believe, and the more we believe the better chance we have of over taking our old rivals and proving once and for all, that North London is ours. Because if their best team in 50 years can`t over come our worst in 30, then they`re never going to finish above us.




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The Journalist

Writer: Rocky7 Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Sunday March 4 2012

Time: 6:24PM

Your Comments

Haha! Good article indeed. The chef has served a healthy dose of pie as well; the humble type. I'd say St. Totterinham's day isn't far off.
Naijagunner
you gave us some ribbing for always banging on about trying to finish above you and now all Arsenal fans cannot think about anything else. A sign of the times and as much about aspirations as it is decline and progression. Remember one result can change everything in football for the fans of the club. Make it 5 and people will take you seriously
Spurs999
999 - The only reason you'll be getting both barrels is because of the grief you've all given us this season. I can't blame you in that regard considering how many years you've gone through this, but football is football, and if we get you then you're not going to hear the end of it for a while :)
Rocky7
It would seem that United does have the tiny Tots' number; They just cannot get it right against the Mancs, try as they would. Like I posted earlier, despite the fact Manure were played off the park early on, the pundits were going on about how resilient the champions are; how they know how to grind out a win and all that. Such credit never gets given for similar results by our team. Not even by our own fans.
Naijagunner
Now, this is an article I'm completely on board with, Rocky :). Should be an interesting finish to the season.
prits
Lol! Long live GoonerChef! I predict humble pie on the menu for the Spuds this year.
Wyn Mills
We'll get the Gooner Chef to knock them up a nice Meat 'n' Ebola pie!
Rocky7
999, do you know how many threads are started on here and get infested with Spurs fans crowing about how you were 10 points ahead with an insurmountable 17 goals difference? If you cannot take it, don't dish it out, mate. Now, it is time to laugh about how you are doing a good job of bottling it. I look at the next set of fixtures for the Spuds and can only think there are a couple of Losses coming; ours are not any better, but on the strength of recent performances, I'd bet we do better at our own games than you would.
Naijagunner
The Spuddies are all very suicidal over at VS, crying for them to get rid of Harry and everything. Lol. And Arsene thinks he's had it bad.
Rocky7
Arsene, take note. The way to avoid being fined by the FA after having a bust-up with your opposite number (as happened today between Pardew and O'Neill) is simply to shake hands briefly afterwards. Who would have guessed it?
Wyn Mills
To those Sp*rs fans claiming hypocrisy on our part in being concerned about finishing above you, there is a significant difference in our case now to yours in previous years. We are 4th - we're in the Champions League places, so the next obvious target for any club is to climb the table, and given that the Manchester clubs are realistically out of reach for both of us 3rd seems the obvious step forward from 4th, no? The fact that the side one place ahead happens to be the neighbours just adds spice to that obvious tussle. Sp*rs fans looking enviously up the table in previous years at clearly superior Arsenal sides when they had yet to hit the top 10 was simply obsessive.
ArsenalRob
nikolaijns
ten to four spuddies, ten to four. What a difference a week makes. I love the smell of fear in the morning :)
nikolaijns
Excellent.
Professor Calculus
If I were to answer objectivley, I would say Sp*rs have an easier run in than us.. We have 5 tough tough games , while Sp*rs are more or less done with their tough fixtures. But ***** that !
Sajit
They have Everton away next followed by chavs away sajit.
nikolaijns
True, but we have Everton away, Chavs at home , Na$ri at home, Stoke away and Barcodes home. Not fixtures I fancy. But hey, neither was anfield. :)
Sajit
Also , I think at this stage its more about getting into a good run of games.. If Spurs can remain in a rut and IF we can overtake them , then I dont worry that much.. But getting ahead of them is going to be the challenge. I'll leave it on this note http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEIeb85DkCs
Sajit
There is something it takes from you when, all of a sudden, you only have the FA replay against Stevenage to play for when you were "title contenders" just 10 days ago. We have a greater motivation playing for 3rd spot and, the fact that some would even accept 4th should mean lesser feeling of entitlement for 3rd spot. I may be wrong but it is set up for a free falling spurs this season.
Naijagunner
Niko, Love it. Ha! It's 10 to 4!! LMAO.
Naijagunner
One can only hope the spuds who follow Wilshere on twitter will be good sports and pay up on their bets. At least, they can point to a cause they had during the season.
Naijagunner
Goonerchef has a new recipe, mmmmm http://www.ndtv.com/video/player/cooking-isnt-rocket-science/everybody-loves-chicken-crumble/23703
nikolaijns
It ain't over 'til the fat Hudd sings.

Spuds-U-Like
 

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