Vital Football

Latest Arsenal FC News

Here Come The Injuries

Here Come The Injuries

Whoop dee doo. It's started well so far this season, 2 games, 4 goals, 1 let in. A fair bit of bite and battle displayed by 'the younglings' (© boromir, lord of the rings).

However, as much as i hate to do it, i have to be the bearer of ill tidings, and a cloud on the horizon.

For here come the injuries. Because YAY, it's time for the FIRST INTERNATIONALS OF THE NEW SEASON. Great, huh? Yeah, i know, i was ecstatic too when i read it.

So 'Raving' Ray Domenech, the maddest manager in International football (it's at this point that I would like to point out that I am only writing this piece cos when i checked, you guys luckily all had the correct star-signs, otherwise you'd be getting nada from me tonight...) has picked Billy 'The Armband' Gallas, Bacary 'La' Sagna, and Abou Diaby, for the French squad as France prepare to face Slovakia and Slovakia 'A' next week.

Prepare thyself for a heavy dose of fun as 'Raving Ray' plays all three of our boys for 90 mins plus injury time in both games, which are on consecutive days.

Laugh yourself senseless as 'Arsenal-newly-signed-French-International 1' picks up an injury in the 33rd minute of the first game, only for 'Raving Ray' to insist he plays on, all the way on into the 93rd minute of the game the following match.

Hold your sides from guffawing too much as 'Arsenal-newly-appointed-captain-French-International 2' gets kicked in the neck and is forced out for up to three months and put in a neck brace.

Chuckle and shake your head in 'what are the chances of that happening, eh?' fashion as 'Arsenal French International 3', already injured prior to being called up for the internationals, is told by his National coach that if he does not play, he will be suspended for 3 games, because his National coach is more mentalist than a sackful of rabid badgers.

Moreover, let's see if 'Ex-Arsenal-captain-who-was-a-striker French International 4' is forced to play for 90 minutes in one of these friendlies, as was 'Le Mentaller's' (manager, not striker) wont during aforementioned French International's time at Arsenal, thus ensuring he returned to his club injured and unable to play for some amount of time. Or will 'Raving Ray' take him off at half-time and put him in a nice cool bath in a wooden crate full of cotton wool, and send him back to Spain in a private jet? One trusts it will still be the former, in continuation with the astrology-loving French manager's previously-followed path of player treatment. C'est La Vie, et Bon Chance, Titi.

All these things, and more, dear readers, will be revealed as we enter 'The International Zone'.

Coming soon, to disrupt a promising start to a season, near you, sooooooooon...



Join the Vital Fantasy Football League - its Free!

Writer:Wingston
Date:Friday August 17 2007
Time: 1:29AM

Comments

0
Funny stuff... but seriously what a *****in' ***** muppet Domenech is calling up Diaby for his squad when he's not even fit to play against Blackburn, Wenger should sue this numpty as well as Madrid. The only good thing to come from this bell end being France manager is that he is to blind to see that Clichy is the best left back in world football, his loss and luckily not ours. Expect Gallas to be out for 2 months come next Saturday, KUNT!
Ozi Gooner
17/08/2007 01:38:00
0
By the way, has anyone seen the nutters on the tottenscum forum. I dont know whats sadder that they are already falling to pieces, fighting like hyenas over a dead animal or that they think they actually have a chance at signing Guti or Van Der Vaart, what a joke those mugs are.
Ozi Gooner
17/08/2007 01:53:00
0
Way to curse us, Wingers!!!! Now the injurys are going to pile on!!! But really it seems the Domenech has it in for AW. Somebody that has done nothing but improve the french side over the years. And funny thing is that Sagna was uncapped before AW signed him now he will be in every french side.
gunnerkid107
17/08/2007 01:56:00
0
All I can say is thank ***** Clichy wasn't called up.
Rocky7
17/08/2007 02:21:00
0
Yeah my point exactly Rocky, the longer he goes unnoticed the better
Ozi Gooner
17/08/2007 02:27:00
0
How is this Clichy kid? I thought the reason you let Cashley go without much fuss was because he was ***** hot, and he's look ***** hot when I've seen him. Is he worth us buying?
Nozzy06
17/08/2007 03:13:00
0
Yeah what ever you numpty clown, stick with your *****in' Norwegian ginger viking and your lil' Brazilian kermit, Clichy has Arsenal in his blood and why would he want to take a step down? Or move to that ***** hole you's call home?
Ozi Gooner
17/08/2007 03:21:00
0
Funny stuff, but I hope it remains just that. I wouldnt like to see more injuries to this side. And yes, I am also relieved that Clichy hasnt been called up, though I get this sinking feeling that its only a matter of time.
prits
17/08/2007 07:31:00
0
I agree OziG, the spud forum just gets sadder and sadder with every passing day. The sense of desperation is so appalling, I actually feel some sympathy for them now. But I am sure that will pass soon :).
prits
17/08/2007 07:33:00
0
Ahh nozzler, got bored of the Chelsea site already... oh well our loss their gain I suppose ;) As you quite rightly say though Clichy is ***** hot so not really the type of player you lot go for... I thought you only brought over hyped spaniards for crazy money
kenny lunt
17/08/2007 08:32:00
Page 1/2
  1. 1
  2. 2

Login to post a comment

Best of Vital Network

Vital F1 - All talk on Ferrari

Recent Arsenal Articles

The Premier League Make Up For 2017/18

All promotions and relegations for the season of 2016/17 have been confirmed, so the full make up of the Premier League for 2017/18 is now known.

Wengers Talks Cup Emotions

Manager Arsene Wenger has been giving more thoughts following victory over Chelsea in the FA Cup Final this weekend.

Oxlade-Chamberlain Talks Wembley

Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain has admitted he felt no fear when Victor Moses went down in the box in the FA Cup Final against Chelsea at the weekend as he knew he hadn't touched him.

Holding - Relegation To FA Cup Win

Young centre half Rob Holding has been reflecting on his own personal journey over the last 12 months following the victory over Chelsea in the FA Cup final at the weekend.

Archived Vital Arsenal Articles

Vital Arsenal articles from

Site Journalists

Write for Vital Arsenal
Write For Vital Arsenal
Apply Here

Current Poll (see more polls)

FA - Chelsea MotM
Suggested By: Site Staff
Ospina15%
Holding2%
Mertesacker61%
Monreal2%
Bellerin2%
Ramsey5%
Xhaka2%
Oxlade-Chamberlain2%
Ozil2%
Sanchez5%
Welbeck0%
Sub - Giroud2%
Sub - Coquelin0%
Sub - Elneny0%
ScoopDragon Premier League Network Sites

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
C Chelsea 38 30 3 5 93 52
2 Spurs 38 26 8 4 86 60
3 Man City 38 23 9 6 78 41
4 Liverpool 38 22 10 6 76 36
5 Arsenal 38 23 6 9 75 33
6 Man Utd 38 18 15 5 69 25
7 Everton 38 17 10 11 61 18
8 Southampton 38 12 10 16 46 -7
9 AFC Bournemouth 38 12 10 16 46 -12
10 WBA 38 12 9 17 45 -8
11 West Ham 38 12 9 17 45 -17
12 Leicester City 38 12 8 18 44 -15
13 Stoke 38 11 11 16 44 -15
14 Crystal Palace 38 12 5 21 41 -13
15 Swansea 38 12 5 21 41 -25
16 Burnley 38 11 7 20 40 -16
17 Watford 38 11 7 20 40 -28
R Hull City 38 9 7 22 34 -43
R Middlesbrough 38 5 13 20 28 -26
R Sunderland 38 6 6 26 24 -40
The Vital Football Members League
Latest F1 News
Latest Vital Boxing News
Vital Football Comment

Recent Arsenal Results (view all)

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.Naijagunner2
Write for Vital Football